COVID diaries - day unknown: situationally altered interaction.
at some point - during every process - you have to make the decision to continue to completion or press the stop button - discontinue expenditure of resources. today i found myself at that juncture. as i write this i am well aware of the fact that the sentiment contained is not bound to the collar of my character. if anyone were asked just three months ago what they would do if suddenly restricted primarily to their home, i dare say the answer would be entirely different than asking what they've done having teleported into that particular dimension. COVID-19. sounds like a blockbuster movie title. some unreal exploration of a planet far away. while unreal aptly sums up our current "pandemic-situation", so many other descriptions come to mind as well. intriguing. oppressive. exasperating. for me the journey has been filled with more than doom and gloom. being considered one of the "essentials", my routine hasn't changed a great deal. the interesting part of walking through this experience is observing the behavior of others confronting the same obstacles. i've heard it said many times - a person's true character will show when they are facing (what appears to be) larger than life challenges. i never understood just how true that statement was. over the past few weeks i have been amazed at the random acts of kindness from complete strangers as well as the utter disconnect from those considered family/friends. and while i've struggled to maintain an objective view of the situationally altered interaction, i can't help but exit the stage from this play forever changed.
for the friend that allowed option of transparency today - prayers. as intimate as revelation can be, most often allocation of presume an easier and more amicable interaction.
tonight, as i passed quickly through the disturbing water of social media, i remembered why i limit my time swimming through the rapids. so easily we plaster those walls of interaction with vivid splashes of our discontent - graffiti innuendos to our anger and hurt. with little regard to our reflection, we distort our image to represent what we suppose, rather than what is actually seen. and when we finish the ritual of (self)defamation, we fall upon ourselves - exhausted - spent - no greater for the effort.
unfamiliar with the landscape of your tomorrow, i will close this post praying peaceful journey for you. i used to worry about insufficient allotments of time to complete all i placed on my agenda. anxiety sat upon the throne of my deliberation. waking merely allowed continuation of my journey into uncertainty. how amazing to type with profound intention this proclamation of gratitude. tonight i follow patterns - routines to satisfy compulsions of closure. tonight i close my eyes - say prayers of thanksgiving. tonight i venture down the corridor of sleep unafraid . if, by chance, there is no waking, it will not mean the end to my journey - merely well deserved relocation to more appropriate accommodations...
"I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well."[Psalm 139:14 ESV]
far deeper than any touch,
much more real,
than feel –
unlike whispers
fading into the air,
carried away too soon -
you are the - air!
all inclusive,
pervasive as nightfall -
you seep into every pore of my being,
filling every cavity of my soul!
i drink you in -
the thirst never satisfied,
and so i must return,
time and again,
to your most pensive fountain!
for the friend that allowed option of transparency today - prayers. as intimate as revelation can be, most often allocation of presume an easier and more amicable interaction.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Monday, May 29, 2017
sometimes, no matter how hard we try, it seems we end up stuck in a rut of frustration. it's not that we've forgotten the comfort of the sun. we didn't wake up and decide to un-believe in possibility. it just feels like no matter which way we turn - barriers - dead ends.tonight, as i passed quickly through the disturbing water of social media, i remembered why i limit my time swimming through the rapids. so easily we plaster those walls of interaction with vivid splashes of our discontent - graffiti innuendos to our anger and hurt. with little regard to our reflection, we distort our image to represent what we suppose, rather than what is actually seen. and when we finish the ritual of (self)defamation, we fall upon ourselves - exhausted - spent - no greater for the effort.
unfamiliar with the landscape of your tomorrow, i will close this post praying peaceful journey for you. i used to worry about insufficient allotments of time to complete all i placed on my agenda. anxiety sat upon the throne of my deliberation. waking merely allowed continuation of my journey into uncertainty. how amazing to type with profound intention this proclamation of gratitude. tonight i follow patterns - routines to satisfy compulsions of closure. tonight i close my eyes - say prayers of thanksgiving. tonight i venture down the corridor of sleep unafraid . if, by chance, there is no waking, it will not mean the end to my journey - merely well deserved relocation to more appropriate accommodations...
"I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well."[Psalm 139:14 ESV]
fountain of you
far deeper than any touch,
much more real,
than feel –
unlike whispers
fading into the air,
carried away too soon -
you are the - air!
all inclusive,
pervasive as nightfall -
you seep into every pore of my being,
filling every cavity of my soul!
i drink you in -
the thirst never satisfied,
and so i must return,
time and again,
to your most pensive fountain!
